Thursday, 29 September 2011

Interview with O'Naturals

Hello friends,

Just a quick plug for me and my friend. I have been interviewed about my hair on this wonderful blog and I have also been taken on as a guest blogger. I am so excited as it is the first time this year I'll be doing this again. I had thought I had lost my mojo, its amazing what falling in love does for you!

please go the site and read and comment, yes its about hair but I think its interesting.

Cheers and God bless xx

Sunday, 25 September 2011

Engaged Lines- A new story

For many years I lived with my friends at our address, each person had their flat but we would come together and have meals, games, conversations etc. For a long time, I took it as granted until one person decided to move out and return to their home. I remember one night where we were eating in oe flat and generally having a good time and I said to them 'girls, hold on to this memory, because one day, that's all it will be, we may never be able to be together like this'. It was like a prophecy, both girls moved out, then the guy and I was left alone. I didn't grieve, I couldn't because I just couldn't believe that it was all gone. Then slowly with help from new friends, I started to grieve and this story is a result from that process. Pardon me if its a bit out there, that's what its meant to be. God bless x


It wasn’t till I got to the junction of WaterWorld that I was certain that something was definitely wrong. I had suspected it two days before, when I woke up at ten am and didn’t hear Nife’s familiar two taps on the door. I had woken up with that disconcerted feeling where you know something familiar is gone but you just can’t quite put your finger on it.

This feeling had continued when I dressed up and was about to go up to Nife’s flat to find out how I had gotten up before her, Cylan had stood behind my door, arm lifted, knuckles clenched to knock when I opened it and he scared the daylights out of me.

At my strangled scream, he gave me a gentle smile and put down his arm and introduced himself as the new tenant in Nife’s flat and told me his name. At my puzzled frown, he said she had talked about me and had kept him as a surprise. Now, I know that I had travelled to the States for two weeks and she had mentioned a change of some sort but I was certain that in our recent conversations, she hadn’t mentioned a new tenant or her wish to move out. I shrugged and looked up at him, he was quite tall, but I wondered what he wanted at my door.

He said he had come to ask for some oil, olive oil to be precise, which as I turned back into the flat to get for him, he walked in and started looking around, somehow, I was also drawn into looking around my flat and it felt somehow strange like someone had been in it in my absence and moved things around. Still in my scrambled mind, Cylan asked me to come up to his flat and I followed him, carrying the oil, into what was formerly Nife’s flat. He opened the door and it was very bare and looked very bright like someone had painted white light over the blue colour of the wall.

I sat on the only chair in the room while Cylan poured the oil into a bottle as he asked about my plans for the holiday. I had not been aware of a holiday so I asked him what he meant. Apparently, in my absence, the government had declared a two day holiday to celebrate some royal event. I mused aloud that it was strange that it had not been mentioned in the States then Cylan asked how my holiday was. To my bemusement, it was like I couldn’t remember much, I went quiet but Cylan just shrugged and silently said many things passed unmentioned in the world.

Without much time to reflect on my forgotten holiday, I somehow ended up spending the whole day with Cylan in his flat. We chatted, listened to music and ate flat bread with the olive oil. Cylan said it was very healthy and that olive oil made him more ‘aware’, it all sounded a bit dramatic to me but the meal was nice. We got on really well and I started to wonder if Nife had organised his ‘moving in’ to match make. I had had boyfriend drought for over two years, so I guessed she was trying to set me up and with the way our conversation had gone and his eye appeal, I could be buying her a ‘thank you’ present.

However, I went to bed with a sense of ennui, it should have been a perfect day but there was some kind of overcast.

Waking up late again the next day, I decided to clean up my flat and call Nife and some other friends. It was looking at my mobile that triggered my first worry for the day. My best friend Caroline hadn’t called me at all! This was very unusual as she was normally the first and last voice I heard daily. I was perplexed with myself that I hadn’t even noticed the previous day, I had spent so much time analysing my meeting and chatting with Cylan that I had forgotten my friends.

Picking up my mobile, I called Caroline to chide her for not calling but the line remained engaged and the same thing happened with every number I dialled. So I decided to finish clearing up, and then try again. I had nearly finished when Cylan came down, I opened the door and he was standing there but with another girl. Oh… she was tall, slim and very pretty. I wasn’t impressed but I kept a straight face as Cylan introduced her as Ada. To be honest, I wasn’t very charitable to her but she was very chatty and after sometime, she wore me down and we started talking about music and when I mentioned that it seemed the phone networks were down, after I had tried to call Caroline and my other friends and still got the engaged tone. Ada shrugged and said it was a usual thing, I disagreed though and questioned why all the providers didn’t leave a customary clients information jingle to inform on problems. Then Ada looked at me, then at Cylan and giggled. This annoyed me.

We ended up watching a movie which wasn’t so memorable late into the night and then I asked them to excuse me as I needed to get up early for work the next day. Cylan then said he also had to go out first thing in the morning and we would walk together. I gave him a half smile and said that would be fine and then they both left but I peeped out my door and found that they both went up back to Cylan’s flat. Very annoyed and confused, I went to bed.

I woke up early, feeling a strong sense of oncoming change; I couldn’t shake it off as I got ready. After a while, I started to feel rather light headed but I pushed through and finished up. Shortly after, Cylan and Ada arrived at my door, with an arched eyebrow, I mentally clocked that Ada hadn’t gone home. Giving her a disgusted eyeballing, I stepped out with them and we headed towards the train station.

As we walked, everyone we met, who normally said hello to me, walked past without a word or even a smile. Again I checked my phone to call Caroline as I was now quite annoyed with her and even though the network reception bars were full, the line still stayed engaged. Very puzzled now, we kept walking and as we crossed the road to where WaterWorld was, the puzzlement left and certainty settled in and my heart started to beat rapidly.

It was the flowers that I saw first, then the police notice asking for information about a serious collision, and then I saw the picture. With my chest thumping and feeling very faint, I felt Cylan’s and Ada’s cold hands hold me as I finally understood.

Friday, 23 September 2011

Facing Truth

I had written previously about coming back with a story or two. Little did I know that my life was to take a novel punch or two. For the past two and a half years, I have been fighting an aggravated condition. I know I have had it all my life but it had never gotten as serious as it then became. It has plagued me for a long time, I had been called lazy because of it, back at secondary school, I had been called a malingerer when I had genuinely felt unwell but in all my years, I had not felt it as bad as I do now.

For two and a half years, I wondered what was wrong with me, some people said it was in my head, some said it was an attack from a demonic person of my acquaintance, some people said I should confess my deep hidden sin and I would find forgiveness and relief. I went for tests (cancer gene, HIV, sexual diseases, blood genotype etc) nothing! The only slightly helpful thing was that I had the alpha thalessimia trait which explained some of my body pain and fatigue, however, it was not enough to explain the sometimes bone wrenching, excruciating pain, extreme fatigue and agonising tremours I suffered constantly.

Then late last year rolling into early this year, the term fibromaylgia was bandied about then confirmed with severe spinal pain was diagnosed and for about ten minutes, I wept like a baby in my consultant's room. I was made aware of the fact that it had no cure and I most likely would carry it for life but this did not dampen my relief that finally, I knew what was ailing me.

Shortly after that I had the threat of cancer and potential surgery but with faith in God, much prayers with friends and some trepidation. I got the all clear on my biopsy and no surgery is needed.

In all that time, I have met incredible people who have gone the extra mile to make my life more comfortable. I have almost loved and lost men who couldn't cope with the fact that I might not be the active, agile woman they want. I have had my faith and trust in God tested and hopefully, I have succeeded. Best of all, I have come to know the real me, who I am, my strenght and my weaknesses. I have found a new love and respect for myself and the whole experience has made me more sympathetic, less impatient and more understanding of the world around me and for that knowledge, I wouldn't give nothing back.

Don't misunderstand me, these conditions aren't things I would wish on an enemy and I wouldn't do them again given the chance. I like being healthy,though I mostly can't remember what that was like, however, the lessons I have gained are invaluable. Family is good and important. Love that doesn't run at the sight of pain is real and best of all, I do not believe the report of the doctors, but rather the report of the Lord which says I can and will be healed.

So as I bask in the mercy of my Saviour and Redeemer, and enjoy the love and closeness of my family and open my heart to the possibilities of love ( I never believed that I would enjoy the intimacy of a romance and the stabily of love) I don't have a partner yet but I now know that it is possible. I wish to let you dear reader know, there is truly sunshine after the rain, no matter how long it falls and there is hope, no matter how dark life gets. I know because itt is my truth. God bless.

Monday, 12 September 2011


I promised that I was going to put in blogs that I've found to be interesting. If you've noticed, I have rearranged the format of my blog. I particularly adore Original Mgbeke, she's just a legend. When it comes to the gossip of what's happening on the Nigerian scene, I usually go to Linda Ikeji and My Naija Lifestyle. Since hooking up with Omozo, I have been paying more attention to my hair and skin and the compliments show I'm not doing badly. I will be guest blogging for O'Naturals once a month, so look out for that, its where I've been picking tips for hair care and generally sharing stories of the joys and headaches of natural hair. Another place for excellent advice on hair and skin care the natural way is LITK.

I'm learning to start loving gently, to be soft and be a woman in the true sence of the word, so I've been reading up Myne Whitman and Till My Dying Day. True accounts from the latter and interesting fictional and occasional love accounts about relationships and their ups and downs.

Its been a very educative, enlightening and interesting browse through the blogs. I hope you find these and others as delightful as I have.

Till then. Take care and God bless x

Love of a special kind

Now I'm no romantic, ok maybe a little bit of a romantic. I like being treated nice like the next girl, being thought of as special. I like to think that a guy somewhere has me on his mind, thinking of ways to make me happy. I have been praying for quite sometime about who my life partner is and how we'll meet and what not and as the reality of it draws closer, I really realise how scared I am of making that commitment, of taking that step and shutting the door on life as I've always known it and open the door to a new life, a new philisophy.

I realise that I can't just say this is how I want my marriage to be and expect everything to fall in line. It is going to be meeting someone who's from a different background and lifestyle and together we lay our dreams down and work together towards us. In this, there's no me, just us. All my notions, beliefs etc have to aligned and adjusted and questioned and I have to answer questions like why,when and how.

I have to think realistically about the future, look at a man and really question if I want him to be the father of my children, the one I sleep next to at night, the one I make love with, look across the table when we're eating, grow old with, etc and it scares me crazy because whether I like it or not, I will have to make that decision and say 'yes, I will marry you' and 'I do'. this is some real scary stuff.

Then I went on Myne Whitman's blog to read whatever new stuff she's written and I came across the StoryCorps video and came across a real love story. I sat and wept like a child for some good minutes. I normally don't cry, but I did because I wondered if anyone would feel the same or something akin to the love between Danny and Annie, I wondered if I would be able to handle such a love and not feel overwhelmed or unworthy of such love. Then I calmed down.

Now, I am a praying woman but I've had to ask God how to pray for my partner, how to know he's the one that will be my shelter in life's storms, the one I can look at thirty years in and say without a doubt that given the chance I would do it earlier and again. I have asked God, I can't say I've gotten an answer yet but I'll keep looking to the skies, waiting for my answer. However, I've come to find out that it is true what the sages say; that love comes to you when you least expect it, when you're not looking, it tiptoes on you and taps you on the shoulder. Crazy thing but yes it is so true.

Please enjoy this video of Danny and Annie and may you find love that stays through the ages, a heart that holds you tight and calls you precious, arms that assure you that their main purpose from that moment on is to hold you, protect you and love you endlessly through time. God bless and take care.

Wednesday, 7 September 2011

Blog Browsing

I have been going online daily just getting into blogs and following quite a few. For someone who has just one follower, I am so caught up by the wealth of information about hair, love and romance and body care. For anyone who reads this, I will recommend some later to you.

I am enriched daily with all the information and gist. I'll be putting up a story soon, so be on the lookout.

God bless xx